The Gray-Haired

red celebrate print baubles hang on green christmas tree
Photo by Nubia Navarro (nubikini) on

Stand up in the presence of the elderly, and show respect for the aged...Leviticus 19:32

This past weekend we had a Christmas party on my mother’s side.  For the first time in many, many years, it was cancelled last year due to no one volunteering to host it.  For as long as I can remember we’ve had parties but, although my Mum’s generation has the want for a party, most no longer have the stamina to coordinate them.  It fell to my generation and there were no volunteers.  My heart went out to the family but we had sickness in my own household; there was no guarantee we’d make it to a party if they had one let alone host it.  Earlier this year, at my request,  I was entrusted with the family finances that remained and offered help and cooperation to make this year’s party happen– which it did.

Planning the party was an incredible amount of stress, but I needn’t have worried, it went off without a hitch.  Throughout the evening I observed the “gray heads” laughing and sharing memories with each other and catching up on the new homes, new babies, and new jobs of nieces and nephews.  Then there were the cousins and cousin-in-laws entrenched in light-hearted chitchat.  Love bubbles floated all around me as I saw what joy getting together brought, especially to the elders.  Their joy made all of the time, effort, and resources invested worth it.

Family: love them, leave them, don’t judge me by them–I laugh every time I read that last one on a t-shirt.  Bob dared me to buy it and wear it to family gatherings.  Getting together with family creates stress in some people with just the very thought of it–I  know, I confess that I’ve experienced it.  There always seems to be that one relative that rubs me raw.  Hosting the Christmas party this year caused me to see family through a different lense, and though that evening was joy-filled, part of me is very grieved by what I’m seeing and hearing.

I fear what will happen when the gray heads, those ones not submersed in technology, who believed in hard work and not entitlement, and knew the value of family, are gone.  What will society be like?  How many times have I witnessed parents in public with their young children but they’re paying no attention to them; their eyes are glued to their gadgets.  I want to say, “Hello.  There’s a real, living being, your child, in your presence, engage them.  Look them in the eye and invite them to talk.  They’ll be grown before you know it.”  Then I’ve seen it in reverse: the kid out with the grandparent who absent-mindedly stuffs food in their face while staring at their gadget and the grandparent looks on in silence, a wistful expression on their face.  I want to grab that kid and say, “Hey!  Look them in the eye and ask them about their life.  They have so much to share and they’ll be gone before you know it.”  Another chance for meaningful conversation and memories shared, lost.

As frustrating as family can be at times, I’d suffer a huge void without them.  Earthly family got me to thinking about heavenly family.

baby in white onesie
Photo by Daria Shevtsova on

The Word became flesh and dwelt among us…  John 1:14

God created man.  He came and talked with Adam in the cool of the evening.  Then man sinned.  And the only way to redeem him, the only way God could bring man around to right relationship with Him again, to have him for the family He longed for, Jesus had to come.  He had to leave Heaven, His throne, and every thing familiar to Him.  He humbled Himself and became one of us.  As a child, He submitted Himself to His parents (Luke 2:51).  He learned the dynamic of the human family on first-hand terms.  He witnessed the ugliness and the beauty of humanity in an up-close-and-personal way.  And despite it all, He loved us to the cross.

Mind boggling, this love that God has for man.

Join me in passing on this love to the gray-haired by means of an unexpected phone call, surprise lunch out, or card via snail mail.  Having done visitation at a nursing home years ago, I remember how forgotten and lonely some of the residents felt.  Let’s show them love and give them the honor that’s due.

Let us also show love and gratitude to the Father of fathers and the Son Who has made us joint heirs with Him.

“The Spirit Himself bears witness with our spirit that we are the children of God, and if children, then heirs–heirs of God and joint heirs with Christ…”  Romans 8:16,17


*For a comic treat, click here and check out some senior experiences and parodies done by “gray-haired” Barb 🙂  To make it even more meaningful, view it with an elder in your own life.

Published by


My husband and I married over 20 years ago on a chilly, rainy, spring day. One year later caught me in a whirlwind as I was celebrating my first wedding anniversary, my first Mother's Day, and my first publication as a freelance writer. The birth of our third child followed a couple months after we celebrated our twins' 3rd birthday. Though a pen has been one of my constant companions, I have not pursued writing professionally due to the monumental task of homemaking and the raising of children. A shout out to my Robert who has been our sole provider while I have had the pleasure and privilege of remaining home with our children to homeschool them. Now, thanks to him, I have the liberty to once again pursue my passion to write and encourage others in written word as we journey with God through life experiences.

4 thoughts on “The Gray-Haired”

  1. Wow. This really got me. That Adam and Eve were family. And then they left … and took us with them. But Jesus went to the cross to restore family again. That’s HUGE. I never thought of it that way. He really *does* understand the challenges we go through. Thank you for sharing this. ❤️


  2. I sure did love reading your blogs! So much truth.

    After our church suffered the sudden and unexpected loss of a Sunday morning greeter, his wife returned to church. I asked her how she was, and continued on my way after a quick embrace. As I sat in service, I thought about the absence of this friendly man—but how everything about the church went on almost without missing a beat. It really saddened me to think that someday, I too will be gone.

    What will be said about me? What will be remembered? This man was remembered, at least by me for his local history lessons, smile, and welcoming spirit. Had I never paid attention, I would have missed out.


    1. It is interesting to imagine what our legacy will be. Even more interesting is that it will most likely be multi-faceted and seen in so many various ways through the lives that we have touched. Daughter, Wife, Mother, Friend–may it be said of all of us that we lived lives worthy of the Giver of life and make Him proud! Also, let’s strive to never miss out on the beauty of others.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s